Have you ever dated a man who’s pursuing you at first and seems really into you, only to have him fade away after a couple weeks?
We’ve ALL been there – and it’s hard to know what to do. Should you call him just to say hello? Or text him something funny you saw that made you think of him?
Before you do that, READ THIS:
Part of what makes a man attracted to you is out of your control – it has to do with pheromones and brain chemistry.
But the other part of attraction IS very much under your control – there are things you can do and NOT do that will either ramp up his attraction for you or dampen it.
Some men run hot and cold quite often – they come closer and then pull away. They seem very into you at first, then they back off.
It’s what we do when he’s withdrawing that either brings him back and makes him feel more attracted to you, or causes him to back off completely – and stay there.
The truth is – there’s nothing you can do or say that will make him “get into you” more. It has to do with the Energy Exchange.
In other words, he’s either “feeling it” for you – and moving the relationship forward – or he’s not. And the only thing you can do under those circumstances is shift your vibe.
So if you’ve only been dating a man for a couple weeks and he’s stopped calling you, rather than trying to strategize or have a talk with him to try to “get” him to call you more, you have to shift the entire dynamic.
You have to LEAN BACK and shift the whole thing.
If he’s not calling you, here’s what you CAN do:
1. First, stare at your phone as hard as you can – WILL him to call you. Did he call or text you? Of course not!
We all know that doesn’t work – but we often still choose to stick to, “If I stare at this phone or think about him long enough, he’ll call.”
But the reality is – when we FORGET about him and the phone, THAT’S when he calls. I know you’ve experienced this!
You know that you don’t want to lean forward by initiating a phone call or text, so what you want to do next is…
2. Delete the string of texts or emails from him. When you stop looking at and obsessing about what he said, or how long it’s taking him to respond, it creates the space for him to move towards you.
3. Put down the phone.
4. Look around you. What is right in front of you? What do you want to do right now that has NOTHING to do with this man? THIS is what’s going to shift your vibe.
We’ve all had the experience when we actually forget about a man – THAT’S when he calls. So it’s about truly forgetting about the phone and the man – let that go – until he shows up again (until HE’S what’s right in front of you)!
This creates the space for him – and many other, possibly better men – to come towards you.
Shifting your vibe is also crucial for when a man DOES show up. If you’ve been sitting around waiting by the phone for his call, he’ll be able to pick this up in your vibe – and it will weaken his attraction to you.
If you’ve been obsessing about why a man isn’t calling, you’re putting out a lot of mental effort – and anger and resentment build in direct proportion to the amount of effort you’re putting out in a relationship.
You want to be as authentically warm and open as possible when he calls – you want to be an invitation. And you can’t possibly be warm and open if you’re angry at him for taking so long to call you.
So practice forgetting about him for now and focusing on what’s right in front of you, and see how this shifts your vibe and gets him – and other men – moving towards you again!